We Have News, and I’m Still Crying

Since we started our adoption journey 4.5 years ago, we have been anxiously awaiting the day we would get this phone call.

With two sisters married in the last 4 weeks, it has been one continuous celebration for Zach and me. First, my sister Emily married Zach’s cousin Tyler, and then yesterday Zach’s sister Aubrey married our new brother-in-law, Chip. A couple of weeks ago, Zach and I got a phone call that our family (including said sisters) have been waiting to celebrate for 4.5 years.

Zach and I got the call a day after my birthday when I was in the middle of a virtual conference. They paused the conference to celebrate the news which may or may not have included a banjo.

What is this AMAZING news that has had me in and out of tears for weeks now?!

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After 4.5 years of waiting, we have officially been matched with our adopted son from the Pacific Island of Samoa!!!!!!!!!!!!! He is 5 years old, and God-willing we will be on our way to Samoa to bring him home around fall 2024. I still cannot get over it. It feels surreal.

I wish I could say the plethora of emotions and tears I have shed in the past several weeks have been only tears of joy, but this is not the reality of adoption. Our son is 5 years old (a little younger than Lily), and when I think about the fact that he has had no one to call mom for 5 years my heart feels like it is being ripped in two, and I sob with grief for my precious boy (he was left at the orphanage when he was a newborn).

Then when I think of the fact that I will be the first woman he will call mom, my heart overflows with an abundance of gratitude that his biological mother chose to give him life and because of that I have the chance to love him and be loved by him in return.

When I think about waiting another 12-18 months to hold his hand, hug him, tuck him in at night, and tell him how much he is loved, I feel a sense of panic over the unknown. Does anyone make him feel loved now? Does he feel safe? Is he happy?

And then in the same moment, I think of Lily who insisted that everyone had a picture of their new baby brother taped on the wall by their beds to remember to pray for him. I think of Caleb’s nightly prayer for his brother that he would “have fun until he comes home,” and I feel my aching heart smile as Jesus reminds me that none of these children belong to me. They belong to the One who created them, and they are never alone, including my son on the other side of the world.

Over the past 4 years we have been incredibly blessed by the support of friends and family, not only through prayer, but through your financial support. The reimbursable expenses of this adoption are approximately $55,000. To date, we have raised $32,500, and we cannot thank you enough.

In an effort to reach our fundraising goal, would you be willing to buy coffee from our adoption fundraiser to help us cover more of the expenses? We earn 50% of everything sold from our Gobena fundraiser, and it goes directly to our fundraising account with Lifesong For Orphans. If everyone we know bought one bag of coffee from Gobena we would be a lot closer to our goal! Or maybe your church pantry needs to be restocked? Maybe the office could buy use high-quality, delicious coffee?

If you do not like coffee but would like to support our adoption, you can donate directly to our Lifesong For Orphans account.

Adoption is a journey, and we cannot thank you enough for traveling with us. Truly, it takes a village. Thank you for celebrating with us. Son, you are LOVED more than you can possibly know.